I wish I was a little bit taller

I haven't slept in twenty four hours, which isn't good because i usually sleep 12. How annoying. And not only could I not escape to my happy place of terror and torment, I had nothing to do. For five hours I have been playing a racing game where one level is smashing yourself into oncoming traffic in order to score points.

Really? Why did we buy this?

I found out that if I had such and such time left to live(like 3months, a year, you know significantly less than what's expected) and there was no chance for recovery, I would leave this place so fast. I think, I would even smile. I've already said fuck off to the people here. I simply won't join their reindeer games. But I am a sheep (or so Keeley says) a grey sheep.

Baaaaa, shoot me motherfucker.

I apologize (to no one, since no one reads this with the exception of two people, three, pfft). I usually do not swear. Hardly...it depends. On the people I'm with. You can tell I'm tired, my sentences lack that scent of fresh teenage blood being sacrificed to the gods of society and conformity. Neither of which I worship. I'm more of (or I like to see myself as) "oh, this looks like fun. Oh you like it to? Then we can like it together. yay!" as opposed to a "Oh MY GOD! Everyone else is doing this and if I don't do it, no one will be my friend! My life will be over!!!" I'm know people like that. It's annoying. Apparently, the word "obnoxious" is a grown up word and they simply won't crack open a fucking dictionary (much less fucking look it up online, where they fucking are, all the fucking time...). And

*they can't use a knife and fork properly
*They have never eaten out at decent restaurant with their friends (apparently it isn't cool to actually talk to your friends *cocks head to one side in confusion*)
*The biggest book they've read is size 14-16 font and 200 pages long. What's the book about you may ask? (Because size doesn't define character) It's about little teenage girls stuck in their little teenage bullshit. (i.e. "How could you shop at Forever 21, Tiffany, you're only 14!")
*oh and how could I forget, everything is "bomb" or "nice"....or "not bomb" or it "sucks" (Maybe I shouldn't say anything, my own vocabulary isn't that vast, compared to the people I adore, that's why I read everything and anything, you know, to learn?)

Have you ever seen me tired? It's like a normal person...on crack. I'm actually calm, just ranting letting it all out. So the stupidity doesn't suffocate me tomorrow. But this thought process above, this is how my mind functions, pointless spasms that occasionally give birth to something worth reading.

Wait till you see me mad.

I wish- The Secret Handshake